Veggie Problems Only Vegetarians Understand
“Okay, we vegetarians get it. All you meat lovers don’t approve of our diet but we don’t approve of yours either. It may seem like some vegetarians may have poor nutrition and a lack of certain micro and macronutrients; WRONG. One day all meat lovers will learn the truth about Jello and marshmallows.”
1. Carnivore friends are more likely than you to loudly announce your vegetarian status to the waiter.
2. You get tired of being lecture about protein and iron by people who have half their arm inside a family-size bag of Doritos.
3. Coworkers that you eat lunch with feel the need to defend themselves.
4. Everyone assumes that you love yoga, kale and accent braids.
5. People you just met harass you about your reason for being vegetarian.
6. Every time you groom yourself, there is an internal battle about switching to all animal cruelty free products.
7. Your S.O will make a big deal about picking out a restaurant: “Relax, I’m super chill with eating out.”
8. After making that self-righteous claim, you ultimately end up at a restaurant that has nothing you can eat.
9. You will be confronted by your carnivore friends about wearing leather.
10. Everyone under the sun has an opinion about your body type.
11. All family gatherings, especially Thanksgiving, are a nightmare.
12. Being the only one who responds to the post-script on a dinner party invitation asking if anyone has a dietary restriction.
13. Vegetarian cookbooks rarely have color photographs.
14. On January 1, at least one of your friend will “go-veg” to lose weight or “see if I can do it.”
15. Other vegetarians are miffed to find out that you are dating a carnivore.
16. Loser dudes will take it as a challenge to be the one to break you.
17. Vegetarian guys think you automatically want to date them.
18. When an ASPC ad comes on, everyone in the room looks at you like it’s all your fault.
19. You get asked about what you will feed your children regardless of whether or not you have expressed interest in having kids.
20. You eventually learn the truth about Jello and marshmallows.
21. You get confuse with vegans and pescatarians constantly.
22. People will ask you about your feelings towards the smell of bacon.
Sound familiar? Yeah, I thought so too.